I may have not gone where I thought I was heading, but I am sure I am right where I need to be

This last month as many of you know Isla was very sick with the flu. We spent 5 long days in the hospital and had it not been for the strength of Joey, my mom, family, and some of the best friends in the world, I would be writing this post from the mental ward. I think as parent you feel so many emotions when your child is sick and it breaks your heart watching them in pain. If I could have taken her place and all of her pain I would have done it in a heartbeat. I was set to start my new job the Monday Isla got sick. I was excited for my new job to start and for a new chapter of my career to unfold. When Isla was hospitalized I felt like everything was falling apart, but somehow as everything was falling apart things in a strange way fell together. Several people have emailed me asking about my new "job"? When I first was hired for the federal investigator position I kept saying it was my "dream job", but it turns out I already had my dream job I just didn't know it. I never pictured myself as a stay at home mom, I have always had such respect for parents who were able to stay home, I guess I just always thought it would be easy to go back to work. I tried to look at all the positives of going back to work, at the time she started daycare I really liked the center and her teacher was/is one of the best people I have ever known to work with children. Working and being a mom is hard and I respect anyone that is able to do it. I felt like I was always running trying to catch up on what I needed to do for the next day and other aspects of my life started to slip. So in short I have put my professional career on hold, I feel like I have the rest of my life to utilize my master's degree. I don't know if it will be on hold for months or years, however I feel content in the position of where I am at. I guess we don't have the extra money we had before, but for the first time in a long time I feel like we have a life again. Time to enjoy the things that matter. I am not writing this as a pro stay at home against working or vice a versa, I guess I wanted to explain to my friends and family where things are at right now for us. I am excited to watch Isla grow and be there to see all of her first. I don't know how long I plan on staying home, but I am confident I will know when the time is right to go back to work..... I may have not gone where I thought I was heading, but I am sure I ended up right where I need to be.